7 Ways to Personal Happiness
This started out as an office joke, but I think it deserves some serious attention. The advice I am going to give comes from things I have read, wisdom I have gotten from others, and personal experience. Take what advice you like, leave what you don’t. All that I ask is that you respect the fact that these are my own views and they may not be what you are looking for. I encourage you all, dear readers, to leave comments if you agree, disagree or have something to contribute. I write this as something for myself to strive for as well. Without much further ado I present you my list:
- Don’t Lie- Specifically to yourself. You are the most important thing in your life. It doesn’t go any other way. Telling a lie to protect the feelings of somebody else only makes it harder to live with yourself. If/when that other person finds out they have been lead along, they too will feel upset and confused as to why they were lead to believe in something that wasn’t true.
- Speak- Start the conversation, even if you have nothing to say. Get your thoughts out so that you can analyze them. This works hand-in-hand with listening.
- Listen- Acknowledge what others are saying. Recognize others feelings as well as beliefs. You may be surprised to find out that there are more people that feel the same way you do. Do not close the doors of the mind. Listen to yourself. Your words may be more telling than you think.
- Respect- Yourself. The whole you. Abusing your body is nothing more than punishing yourself. What have you done wrong to deserve this self punishment? Take care of what you have. You weren’t born with spare parts.
Respect others for their views and their opinions as well as their choices. Do not let opposing views get under your skin. - Move on- Learn from what has happened in the past. Dwelling on this will not get you anywhere. I have a quote that sums this up very succinctly:
“The Moving Finger writes; and having writ,
Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all your Tears wash out a Word of it”-Omar Khayyam - Set Goals- High ones. You are more capable than you realize. It is easy to settle, but it is far more satisfying to work for something and earn it. Failure to attain lofty goals should not be seen as your downfall. Be proud of the work you put in.
- Love- Love what you do, who you work with, your hobby, your pets, yourself.
I will be updating this and refining it as the week progresses. I hope that you get something out of it. If not, let it be a reinforcement to what you already know. Oh, and last but certainly not least, my un-official number 8. Smile.
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by Larry
On January 31, 2007 at 9:28 am
Most of this is pretty helpful, whether known already or not. I especially like #5 at the moment, as people seem incapable of learning from the past or moving on from it. Make a mistake, deal with it, and get moving. Wallowing in anything that’s happened is pointless – you’re either dead from it or you’ve learned. Keep going.
My quandry, my concern, is with #4. While I like the concept of it, “let’s all be nice, everyone gets an opinion,” that’s simply not possible. No matter who you are, there is a person, or group of people, who will annoy the everloving hell out of you simply for being different. As an example, for me, it’s anyone who is intolerant of another person for something they can’t change – race, sexuality, etc. Religion can be changed, so anyone who holds it against a person needs to be sent back to the Crusades to experience the wonders of it.
Now, granted, someone can be racist or prejudiced for a number of generally accepted and understood reasons. “I was abused as a child!” “A black person once tripped a guy I knew!” Whatever the hell it is, I don’t care. It’s just that, for some reason, I have absolutely no capability to respect, listen to, or consider my equal anyone who acts that way. It’s almost hypocritical I suppose, me being intolerant of someone who’s intolerant, but we all have quirks like this.
Peace, love, and respect are nice, but I don’t see them happening when human nature is a factor.
by travis
On January 31, 2007 at 11:37 am
And I am not inclined to disagree. Perhaps it should just be removed as this is 7 ways to PERSONAL happiness? Respecting others is something that I feel is important, but it is out of place in this list as it is something relating more to moral character rather than quality of life for yourself. Good point.
by Chris HP
On February 1, 2007 at 7:13 am
I’m glad you put a little strike through some of that. I have a hard time respecting a crack whore for her choices, regardless of how little daddy loved her.
In an ideal world, all of these would be easy. Personally, I have a bit of trouble with “move on,” which leads to trouble with respect. It’s not like I enjoy dwelling, I just do it.
And I’m not so good at the lying thing… if I know it’ll save me a long awkward conversation, I will tell a small lie. Like when asked about my percentages of facebook fuckery, Meg asked if her sister was on the “no lay” list. I smiled and said “Uh… yeah.” My life was certainly better for that.
by travis
On February 1, 2007 at 10:03 am
You never know what would happen during that long awkward conversation HP. The other person might be able to relate to you in some way that you might have never seen otherwise. For example, maybe Meg has one of your brothers on the “lay” list. If that was the case, you two could have one very awkward thing in common.
by Chris HP
On February 1, 2007 at 2:01 pm
See, that is what I’m trying to avoid. And as much fun as it is to connect to someone, sometimes I just don’t have the energy. when i’m tired, I hate talking to people. It’s draining. Also, ew.
Also, I was playing video games, so i speedbowled a “no” there.